Feeling Valuable and Unworthy
- Sydney Villeneuve
- Jul 25, 2024
- 2 min read
When talking about self-esteem and self-worth, the terms are often used interchangeably, when in actuality they impact the way we see ourselves quite differently. So, what is the difference and how do they each feel?
Self-esteem is how you feel towards the way you outwardly deliver yourself and how you are received by others. It is perceived from more of a bird's-eye view, from first impressions to your felt successes and achievements. Our relationship with our self-esteem is experienced by how we feel about our outer, most-perceived self, or the way we introduce ourself to the world.
Self-esteem is determined by the value placed on our…
First Impressions
Career Choice(s)
Hobbies & Interests
Economic Status & Assets
Physical Appearance
& More
High self esteem can leave you feeling proud and confident, where low self-esteem can feel like powerlessness and self doubt.
Self-worth is about our internal sense of self--how we evaluate and measure out our worth as a living being. It is the worth we attribute to our character, personality traits, values, moral system, etc. It is also measured by how capable we believe ourselves to be. Our self-worth can even extend to how we feel we are perceived and valued within our relationships beyond what we tangibly “bring to the table."
High self-worth can feel reassuring and safe, where low self-worth could feel shameful and undeserving.
Thoughts about your self-worth can sound like:
I am a loving person
I don’t contribute to the goodness of this world
I provide security to myself
I don’t think I have what it takes to push through
I am worthy of love and connection
I am unimportant and replaceable
I am a good friend, partner, parent, etc.
I am not strong enough to handle this
I am resilient and resourceful
Surprisingly enough, self-esteem and self-worth do not always align with one another. While you can have both high or low self-esteem and self-worth, you can also be navigating how it feels to have high self-esteem with low self-worth, or low self-esteem with high self-worth. The two exist on parallel, everchanging spectrums that don’t always influence the other. Being aware and attuned to where you sit with your self-esteem and self-worth is valuable when working on your identity, and on your relationship to yourself and other people in your life. The love, compassion and boundaries you hold and create space for are built from the foundation of where you face yourself—engaging in this form of inner work is worth its weight in gold, just like you!
Sources
*Graphics created using Zinnia
https://uncw.edu/seahawk-life/health-wellness/counseling/self-help-resources/self-worth#:~:text=Self%2Dworth%20is%20the%20internal,someone%20struggling%20with%20feeling%20worthy.
It's interesting how the article distinguishes self-esteem as our outward, perceived self from self-worth as our internal evaluation of character and values. The idea that these two can exist on parallel spectrums and not always align is a really insightful point about our complex relationship with ourselves. For anyone exploring these concepts further, the Bizarre Lineage Wiki might offer some additional context.
It's really insightful how the article distinguishes between self-esteem as our outward, perceived self and self-worth as our internal evaluation of our own character. The idea that these two can exist on parallel spectrums and not always align is something I've definitely felt but never had the language for. For anyone looking to explore this inner work further, Neverness to Everness Wiki offers some additional context on personal growth.
It's really insightful how the article distinguishes self-esteem as our outward, perceived self from self-worth as our internal evaluation of our character and values. I hadn't fully considered that these two can exist on separate spectrums, like having high self-esteem but low self-worth. This distinction is a great starting point for inner work, and ScopeQuill has some related perspectives on this topic.
It's really interesting how the article distinguishes between self-esteem, which is about how we're perceived by others, and self-worth, which is our internal evaluation of our own value. I never considered that someone could have high self-esteem but low self-worth, feeling confident outwardly while feeling undeserving inside. This distinction is something I'll be thinking about, and for anyone exploring this further, SubtitleOps might be a useful resource.
Read "Feeling Valuable and Unworthy" a moment ago, and I liked how clear and grounded the writing felt. The part around 12 tile splitter really stood out to me. Looking forward to reading more like this.