Thoughts vs. Thinking: Knowing the Difference Can Transform Your Mental Wellbeing

            *Image from Executive Support Magazine via Google Images

Have you ever had an intrusive thought? This could sound like, “What if it doesn't work out?”, “Am I doing enough?”, “They don’t like me”, “Are they mad at me?”, or “What if I fail?” Have you ever had one tiny thought that suddenly spiraled into a thousand other thoughts? Have you ever spent hours trying to analyze, figure out, or replay a certain thought over and over again and then ended up completely overwhelmed and stuck? If you have, it might be helpful to differentiate between thought vs. thinking and establish a new relationship with your mind. The goal isn’t to stop thinking; it’s to change the relationship we have with our thoughts and get better at recognizing which thoughts actually deserve our attention.

Thought vs. Thinking

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A thought is automatic. It’s an idea, image, or concept that just pops up. Our mind generates thousands of automatic thoughts throughout the day. They can be random or something from our past might just come up. In other words, thoughts are something we cannot control.  

Thinking is what we do with that thought. It’s a verb, so it’s an active and deliberate process. Thinking isn’t inherently bad. We need to think in order to problem-solve, plan, make decisions, or even learn from our mistakes. We can reflect if it leads to insight, action, or highlights clear goals/what our next steps could look like. 

Thinking becomes a problem when we get stuck replaying, reviewing, ruminating, figuring out, analyzing, processing, or even arguing with ourselves. A thought can last seconds. Overthinking, spiraling, or ruminating can last for hours because we might be asking the same unanswerable questions over and over again. This can sound like, “Why did I do that?”, “What did they mean by that?” or “What does this mean about my future?” Then we get stuck in analysis paralysis and repetitive loops. If we feel more anxious or out of control from thinking, then we might actually be ruminating or overthinking. 

Our brains overthink to protect us. When we are faced with uncertainty, our brain convinces us that if we keep thinking about it enough, then we’ll find the answer. The mind keeps searching for certainty, fears failure, feels the need to understand why, and feels the need to prepare for every possible catastrophe. So, the mind continuously asks questions to regain control, but in turn, we get trapped in our own minds. It creates more “what if’s”, self-doubt, and exhaustion. Overthinking can therefore increase our anxiety and depressive symptoms. 

The image below shows an example of how rumination can become a vicious cycle if we engage with every intrusive thought that pops up. 

         *Image from Therapy Central via Google Images

Tips to Change Your Relationship With Your Mind

1. Regulate your body 

2. When you notice you’re overthinking, reconnect with your body. This can help reduce overthinking and intellectualizing and help shift your nervous system into a more relaxed and safe state. 

3. Notice any tension throughout the body. How does your head feel? Your chest? Your shoulders? Do you feel any warmth, heaviness, or tightness? If you do, take a breath, tell yourself you’re there for yourself, take a slow exhale, stretch out your body, take gentle movements, and shake out your arms and legs. 

4. Regulate first, then reflect. 

5. Don’t fight your thoughts or feelings

6. Overthinking can be like quicksand. The more we fight our thoughts and the more we chase certainty, the deeper we can sink into the rabbit hole. 

7. Let the thoughts exist. Imagine them being like clouds passing by. We don’t have to grab onto or engage with every single one. Just say hey to the thought and then move on/go back to what you were doing. 

8. Sometimes we don’t need an answer; we just need to feel. Let the anxiety, sadness, excitement, or disappointment move through you. Try to resist intellectualizing through something that has to be felt.

9. Use Socratic questioning

  *Image from Lovon via Google Images

• Be curious about your thoughts rather than immediately accepting or rejecting them. Instead of asking “why,” try asking the following:

  • What is the evidence for/against this thought?

  • Could there be another explanation?

  • What would I tell a friend if they were thinking this?

  • What is in my control?

  • What do I need?

  • Is this a problem to solve or a feeling to feel?

• You don’t have to believe every thought

• Your brain might tell you that you’re a terrible person, a bad parent, that someone hates you, that you’re going to fail, or that you’re going to embarrass yourself. 

• Create distance with your thoughts with cognitive diffusion. Observe and notice rather than identifying with the thought. This can sound like the following:

  • I’m noticing that my mind is looking for certainty.

  • I’m noticing that my mind is telling me I’m a bad parent.

  • I’m having the thought that I’m going to fail. 

  • This is just a thought. It does not define my identity.

• Sit in uncertainty

• When you notice that you’re starting to overthink or solve something, practice sitting in uncertainty or the grey area. This can sound like the following:

  •  I don’t know what’s going to happen, but I can/will handle what happens. 

  • I am choosing not to figure this out right now.

  • I am choosing not to engage in this thought.

  • I will figure this out later.

• Practice mindfulness

• Bring your attention back to the present moment. Notice your breath. Notice your feet on the floor. Look around the room. Notice what you smell. What are you doing at this moment right now? Return to that. 

• Mindfulness helps interrupt the cycle of overthinking and help you reconnect with yourself and your coping skills.

Final Thoughts

The goal isn’t to stop thinking or to think less. The goal is to notice our thoughts, decide which ones are worth engaging with, just notice or let the other ones pass, and learn to sit in uncertainty. Your mind is going to keep thinking. That’s natural. You don’t have to fight the thoughts, and you don’t have to believe or solve every single one either. You might not control what thought pops into your head, but you can control what you do afterwards. 

Connect with your therapist, our office, or one of our therapists if you’d like to practice this or learn more about thoughts vs. thinking. 

Sources

Caspari, J. (2023, November 18). Thoughts are just thoughts. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/living-well-when-your-body-doesnt-cooperate/202311/thoughts-are-just-thoughts

Granneman, J. (2021, August 24). The difference between thinking deeply and overthinking. Introvert, Dear. https://introvertdear.com/news/the-difference-between-thinking-deeply-and-overthinking/

Tava Health. (2026, April 15). Breaking the cycle: Rumination, overthinking, and how to interrupt them. Tava Health. https://www.tavahealth.com/guides/rumination-overthinking